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Watching the bus. And watching it leave. I still stood there.Fuck. I couldn't do it. Again. Maybe the next one. Or a lorry.It was one of the bad days. There are only bad days now. Some are justbad, some are worse. But never good days. The days where I can't standit. The days I can't look into a mirror without getting theoverwhelming compulsion to smash it. Rather with my head than anythingelse. Maybe I would bleed to death then.But I did nothing. I never did anything. I just felt miserable.Sometimes more, sometimes less. But always miserable. I moved hereyears ago. Trying to find new opportunities. Tried to be unknown. Butto be honest, I never had many friends. Except for Ian. My family,well, we're never been close. My mum contacted me sometimes, sayingshe's sad I moved away and always being so distant. My dad ran awaywhen I was little. Maybe he was my role model and inspired me to runaway as well. Don't know if he had the same motives though.The only person I always got along with. When's my tea going to be ready?" Oh, Mum, I'm sorry."She reluctantly let go of Dan and went and finished what she had started.Gina went back to work on Monday. Dan met her at one o'clock at a jeweller in Pitsbury and they chose her engagement ring. It took a long time but in the end Gina went for a simple white gold ring with lots of small but brilliant diamonds. She wanted to give Dan a ring but immediately sensed his reluctance and backed off."Do you think he'll wear a wedding ring?" she asked Molly."Not from choice, I'd guess," Molly replied with a wry grin. "Neither of your fathers ever did and he's a bit of a stick in a mud. You can always try but I doubt he'll be very enthusiastic. I don't know. It is the modern fashion so you might get lucky."Gina nodded ruefully. "I won't press him. It's where his heart is that matters."Molly chuckled. "On his sleeve? It certainly is at the moment."Gina's smile was almost shy.The next day she was even shier, pulling Dan out of the kitchen..
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